XVI - A Cup O' Kindness Yet (Part I)

I have utterly loathed 2013. It's been a horrid year filled with horrid events, horrid people and horrid occasions. I'll give the Devil his due: It's continued fighting until the bitter end.

Today, I had to attend the Jobcentre in order to claim travel expenses. Now, I can hear the heart attacks of every English person over 60 who is gasping "W-W-WHAT?! B-BUT H-H-HE'S ON THE D-D-D-DOLE!! HE C-C-C-CAN'T GET A-A-A-ANYMORE M-M-M-MONEY!!!" but rest assured that the bus service in this region is utterly awful and the cost increases at a whim, so I bloody need it. Unless there's anyone under 60 who fancies feeding me for free and paying my lodge money?

I digress. So I had to go in to claim travel expenses. Simple enough task, I thought.

When I got there, my usual Advisor wasn't there. What a shock. So I was given another Advisor, also called Wendy.

What followed was another one of those things which makes me look at the Jobcentre Plus, tilt my head, and go "Why the fuck do you even exist again?".

There was zero clue as to what to do, mostly because we never set out working hours. I could be working 9 til 5 Monday to Friday, I could be working 9 til 1 somedays and 1 til 5 the next, or I could be working 3 days out of 7 (Work Experience usually is only 25-30 hours per week. But, thanks to the economic state of Britain and the ConDem Government, a company can step over that mark, and it's not like the worker can complain. Not only is it all they've got, but they complain and that's one less reference to use. The Government won't care. They've become like our Monarchy: Pretending that it has supreme power, but is ultimately a shell and all power is just posturing. Just look at how Amazon, Google and Starbucks laughed in their faces.), but we don't know. It was never set out by anyone. 

For reference, I was told these things are USUALLY set out. Well, in Redcar at least, apparently, where the Advisors work with the businesses to set out the hours a work experience volunteer (Intern?) is to work, so that they can fit in "signing on" around the working hours.

Not for me, apparently. This gives me the utmost confidence in the JCP. Well, it gives me the utmost confidence that they'll end up violently screwing me somewhere down the line.

So, I'm stuck without a clue on that. For my travel expenses, we worked nothing out. They can either pay me in advance, or I can claim them retrospectively. I brought up that I may be getting a lift down to the place of work somedays, so they immediately suggested claiming it retrospectively.

Then they told me its best to wait til Tuesday when I sign on so we can figure something out.

"But i'll be at work experience, won't I?"

"Ah."

Honestly, the most underwhelming, worrying word in the English language is "Ah." It's a monosyllabic utterance that indicates someones either about to be extraordinarily screwed, or someonone/something has been completely and utterly screwed up. When Genghis Khan Horde's rampaged through Eastern Europe, i'm betting you that the last word uttered by every knight seeing an arrow fly towards them was "Ah." (Followed by "AGGGGHHHHHHH!!!") When Stalin had dissidents taken to Gulags, the last words they probably said was "Ah." When Britain managed to vote in the Tories despite their track records, I like to think we all sat back and went "....Ah."

It's a horrid word. And it got me.

What followed was verbal wrestling and jostling.

It's safe to say neither of us knew what the hell was going on. I assumed JCP would work with a potential employer to work out signing on days. I'm sure they assumed it would be sorted out by magic from the magical JCP pixies. Needless to say, even my signing on day is in doubt. I was basically told "Well, on Thursday, talk to your employer and see what's going on."

That was my plan anyway, but I assumed the JCP, having basically signed my rights and two months of my life to a prospective employer, would lift a finger.

So, Thursday should be fun. After all, i'm sure if you run a business, the first thing you want to hear from a volunteer is "Uh, I might not be able to work one day, cause I have to sign on." Either way, all they did was give me a number to phone (A THIRD adviser. Not even my usual adviser or the adviser I got today. That's good fucking business.) in case the shit hits the fan.

Sad but true. I need my dole. I've got lodge to pay, i've got food to buy, and if i'm working 9 til 5, Monday to Friday (For the record, I assume these'll be my working hours.), i'd like to think I wasn't doing it for nothing.

And here lies the entire problem:

It's not exactly something I can turn my nose up at. If i'm working Monday-Friday 9 til 5 for my fortnightly benefits, then that is what i'm doing. I have no choice. If i'm working for FREE, I have no choice. If I walk in every night of the weekday, lie in the entrance passageway, and slowly die, I have no choice.

Thanks to Britain.

Employment here in the North East is grim enough, that finding someone who would even take one goddamn chance with me was a battle that took several months. I can't turn down doing unpaid work for this company, because it's all i've got. I can't run to the Police or the Jobcentre complaining about my "rights" (Which I have minimal of thanks to ConDem bureaucracy.) , because all I have is my TEFL to turn to, and I can't spend the next several months sitting around, looking lost. 

This work experience is needed. If TEFL ever ends up not being for me, then this chance, this shot, is all i've got. I NEED the reference on my CV, and I need the experience. Even if i'm slaving away, it's what I need. It's all i've got. I can't turn around and go somewhere else, because there's nowhere else to go.

That is the grim reality of Middlesbrough, and I will forever rue the day I was born in such a place.

It's all I have. It's all I've got.

When I opened this blog, I said that I hoped it would have a happy ending. Consider this work experience a microcosm preview: Will there be a happy ending? Or will I be laying down until the end of February in the entrance passageway, slowly dying?

I guess we'll see.

Happy New Year.